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Archives for February 2010

Forever and Always…

When I first started reading blogs, I was just that, A reader. Nothing more. I read who my sister read, kept up with their lives and loved the inside look into everything they did. I’m a nosy person by nature. Very nosy. I’m the person everyone comes to when they want to know what is going on, and usually, I know. Reading blogs seemed to fulfill this need I had to always know what was going on.
I don’t remember who the first person was that changed me. Somewhere along the line I became so wrapped up in the lives, the tears and the laughter. I cried along side of their sorrows and journeys, laughed along side of their joy’s and jokes.
My husband one night turned to me and said “You have to stop doing this to yourself, you can’t get so wrapped up in someone’s story.” After I had spent HOURS reading back through someones complete archive. I just couldn’t get enough.
I have never been much of a book reader. I never found an author that I got. But here, I found authors I got. Authors that spoke to me and to my soul.
I realized that these words I am reading are someone else out These words aren’t here because they are writing for someone to read, they are writing to get the words out of their head. I just happen to be privy to their thoughts. They enjoy sharing them with others.
As time went on, I became more enthralled with the writings and lives of so many women. Their stories are so amazing. Their lives are unbelievable, their strength is
unmeasurable, their faith is unmovable.

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I don’t remember when I first started reading Beth’s blog. She was someone my sister read so I did too. I remember when she announced she was pregnant, and at the same time with the TWINS! My sister and I live a state apart. So we text A LOT! I remembering talking about Beth announcing she was pregnant. It came around the same time a few other bloggers announced also. The text went something like “Did you see folding laundry is pregnant with TWINS?!?!” We were so excited, we read every day to see the newest updates, the newest baby bump pictures. And that picture when everyone was 4 at the same time. The kids were both 4 and she was 4 months along.
I remember the morning not long after that when I arrived at work, and sent the text.. “Have you read folding laundry today?” My heart racing. My hands shaking, and tears already welling in my eyes.

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Its funny how weird it seems to people who don’t get what this community is about. The people who don’t see the miracles performed when this community rallies around one and another. People don’t understand that moments like these stick with you forever, like it is your own family, your real best friend. Its a Princess Diana, JFK, 9-11 kind of moment. Something you will never forget, something you never want to forget. Something you wont forget for them.
From the moment Beth shared with all of us the birds reminded her of James and Jake, I see them everywhere. Every time I see
two birds together, two statues, two pendants, on a picture, in a tree. I think of Beth and I think of James and Jake. I know others do too. I have seen it.

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Being a parent is terrifying. I would be lying if I said I have never thought of the what-ifs. What if this was me? It could so easily be, I deserve it as much as any of these other women. Or I guess I don’t deserve it anymore than any of these other women didn’t deserve it. I have always thought that my main concern would be people forgetting. I would never want them to forget. So I know I make a conscience effort to smile a little more, say a little prayer, or just send a good thought any time I see those sweet boys. All for someone I have never met before. There’s where it gets good.

So today, James and Jake, on the day you were born. We remember you. You are never ever forgotten. And you are loved more today and more everyday..

{Photo borrowed from I Should Be Folding Laundry}

The BEST Chocolate Chip Cookies

I’ve been known to explain to people that I have suddenly become a vegan who eats meat.
It’s easier than explaining that Miles has food allergies, and because he is still drinking breast milk (Shaken, not straight from the tap) I have to eliminate some of his allergens from my diet. I have been dairy free in March. Egg, Soy, Peanut and Dairy free since August.

Eliminating these foods DOES NOT mean I have given up on some of my favorite foods. It just means adapting the recipes I have and finding new recipes.

I can’t even being to tell you how much my life changed when I realized, “Hey, I’m just a vegan who eats meat.” There are so many recipes for vegans, not many for people looking to remove dairy and eggs because of allergies.

Which brings me to: THE BEST CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES YOU’VE EVER TASTED!!!!!!
No, seriously. I don’t think I will EVER make any other recipe for chocolate chip cookies. These are THAT GOOD. Consistently.

Vegan Chocolate Chip Cookies – (or Dairy Free/Egg Free Chocolate Chip Cookies)

2/3 c melted “safe” butter (Fleishmann’s Light/Nucoa/or any other) *

3/4 c white sugar

1/4 c maple syrup

2 tbsp applesauce

1 tsp vanilla extract

2 1/2 c flour

1 tsp baking soda

1/4 tsp salt

1 c chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 375°F.

Beat together melted butter*, sugar, syrup, applesauce and vanilla in a bowl.

Combine flour, baking soda, and salt. Slowly add into mixture. Mix in chocolate chips. (If the dough appears too dry add a small amount of water, just a tsp or two until it comes together more like cookie dough)

Drop by spoon fulls (or cookie scoop) onto a cookie sheet. Bake for 8-10 minutes.

*you can also use a safe oil like Canola oil in place of butter. They don’t turn out quite as good but still pretty darn good.


I wish I could convey the awesomeness of these cookies. I will never ever go back to a “normal” chocolate chip cookie recipe again. These are everything that makes a chocolate chip cookie perfect! :)

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When I get into the store of Miles allergies and the foods I eliminate for him, I get a lot of mix reactions. Most of them however, are of the “That must be so hard, I could never do that.” OR “Wouldn’t it be easier to just put him on formula?”

1) his formula would cost OVER $400 a month! and that is if he’d even drink it. He won’t touch it with a 10 foot pole
2) YES, it would be *easier* to put him on formula. I don’t particularly love pumping and how much time it takes up. I hate it.. but I didn’t become a mom to take the easy route.
I will ALWAYS do what it best for my family. When it comes down to it, you’d do it too. (or at least I hope)
Sure, its hard sometimes. There are days I’d kill for a grilled cheese sandwich or a little mayo on my sandwich, but it’s not worth it to me. I am his mom. It is my duty to protect him in every way possible. I will do that always.
So me living without eggs, dairy, soy and peanuts for the next year is the least I can do for him.
How could I not?