“Congratulations on your successful match meeting”

The email subject was all I needed.

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We made the most of our short trip to LA and had a whole day to ourselves to explore.

We weighed our options (and the cab ride prices) and decided to hit Santa Monica pier. To spend the day on the beach, just the two of us. It was such a great day (even if we though we were soaked to our knees and had shoes full of sand)

After a few (sunblockless) hours we headed back to our home sweet home to wait for more news and our next step..

But first.. I had to survive the flight…

Sunburned.. Terrified and still on a high from our match meeting and day at the beach..

We knew this part of the journey can be where things REALLLLLY slow down. Patients is not a virtue I posses so I wasn’t looking forward to this phase.

I was thankful my IM (intended mother) had a short window to make this all happen, we both played “the squeaky wheel gets the grease” card and got things moving WAY faster than I think they would have.

Lawyers were contacted, Contracts were drafted, signed and cosigned.

Then… It arrived..

(Giant box of medication)                                                    (all of my medication organized)

Getting that box of medication was like Christmas. It was SO real at that point. I emailed my IM something like “HOLY CRAP!” (except not really, but I was thinking it..)  Some of my favorite Surro sisters helped me with some ideas on how organize everything and get it all ready.

I started my medication last Thursday. I also have an ultrasound and blood work EVERY WEEK! Basically I am one giant pin cushion right now. But oh my, it’s SOOO worth it.

(That is NOT a muffin top, nor is that a stretch mark. Just so we’re clear!)

Every shot, every pill, every (internal!) ultrasound gets me closer to helping this family I love so much. There is nothing I’d rather be doing..

July 25th.

Keep us in your thoughts and prayers…

We took our seats in 24D and 24E. My nerves are through the roof. I (suddenly) hate flying. I am so terrified of everything about it. Aaron tries to make small talk with me to take my mind off of it. (Even though it doesnt work.) I nervously look down at my fingernails. He lowers his head too.

“You hate it, don’t you,” I asked him refering the grey fingernails I had just painted the night before to match my flyaway cardigan.

“Yea, kinda. But they match your sweater,” He replies honestly. At least he noticed…

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LA was just as beautiful as the last time we were there (EXACTLY A MONTH AGO!) (We were becoming quite the LA adventurers!)

I was N-E-R-V-O-U-S!!!

I smiled (inappropriately) at EVERY couple that looked like they could have been my IP’s. My BIGGEST fear was running into them before I “officially” met them. What if they saw me yelling at Aaron, or freaking out over my hair, or picking a wedgie or something??

I was TERRIFIED of running into them. So I was on my best behavior. (some of my surro friends have told me this is a VERY common fear, so I dont feel as weird about it now!)

We arrived at the office, and again.. I paniced.

I slowly cracked open the door of the HUGE building, peeked around to see if I could see anyone that “might be them.” I couldnt, so I RAN to the elevator. How embarrassing would it be to ride on the elevator with them before you knew you were there to meet each other? I pushed the button and quickly the close door button. My hands were sweating. I was just smiling at Aaron, hoping he could say something to make everything ok. He tried.

When the elevator arrived at the floor, I made him get out and go look for them. When he reported the coast was clear I ran to the door of the agency. Now my fear turned to sitting in the waiting room when they walked in. How would I know if it was REALLLY them, or just another co0uple that looked like them?

We waited… and waited and waited..

Before someone came out to tell us our appt wasn’t for another hour. ANOTHER HOUR OF THIS????

But we made the best of it and did the tourist thing around the area. And we had A LOT of fun!

When we returned we found our IP’s were in the room waiting for us and getting “briefed”

(Bring on the NERVES)

There were only two questions I really wanted to ask during this meeting..

1) if they were Christian. (Not that it mattered ONE BIT to me, but I was simple curious if they would be offended if I mentioned how much I pray from them (every.day) Really I guess the question should have been “Would you be offended if I mentioned that I pray for you?” That’s WAY more PC!)

2) If I could blog about my experience (In case you were wondering, the answer was YES, but with some anonymity. I will not mention their names, their occupation or where they live. This will be a chronicle of the pregnancy and the process. Not to many things will be told about their family.)

As we walked into the room, my nerves didn’t come with me. It was amazing. I saw her sitting there and just like a cheesy movie, it was like no one else was in the room.

I will admit, one of the first things I noticed was that she was wearing almost the same cardigan as me. :)

Our meeting went great, we both smiled an inappropriate amount of times! We both stared at each other and it was fantastic!!!!

I was SO glad they agreed to go to lunch with us, That’s when the conversation got real. It’s amazing how this situation really opens you up. We went from meeting less than an hour ago to already starting to get our periods synced up. The poor guys sitting at the lunch table that had to listen to us discuss when our last periods were!

She stopped me on our walk to lunch, the guys continued infront of us. She told me how grateful she and her family were for what I was doing. How her mom had asked her to tell me thank you.

All I wanted to do was tell her thank you back. It crazy to me how they feel like I am doing this HUGE thing for them, but I feel like they are doing a HUGE thing for me. Trusting someone to carry your child is not an easy feat. I am so thankful for them..

Protcol is that we had 24 hours to respond to the agency to tell them yay or nay. The SECOND we hugged goodbye and got in our  respective cars I sent the email, “YES,  I love her SO much and they are SO perfect for us.”

I secretly hoped she did the same.

We arrived back at the hotel and I laid on the bed replaying everything from the day, my phone chimed. It was her, sending me and email telling me how great it was to meet us. My heart fluttered and I knew THIS WAS IT!!!

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As we sat in silence all devouring our lunch Aaron looked down at her hands, I followed his eyes. We turned to each other and smiled. Her nails were painted a perfect shade of grey that matched her cardigan perfectly…

WOW.. what an amazing whirlwind I’ve been in lately.

So when I left off, we had just gone to LA for our psychological and medical screening.

I briefly mentioned that the agency had a couple already in mind for us. (one they were “holding” for us.) So we were in a HUGE hurry to move things along for this couple.

The agency sent me their profile the SECOND I landed back in LA. My finger have never been so shaky opening an email, I screamed for everyone to come in because IT WAS HERE!!!

I clicked.

Waited for the download..

Then DEVOURED every word. Well, that’s not entirely true. I read it, FAST. Reading everything top to bottom in record time. My stomach filled with butterflies, my arms covered in goose bumps. Then I stopped, took my first breath. And SLOWLY returned to read every word, letting every thought really sink in.

I just couldn’t believe that we had the chance to work with this couple. Everything about them was SO PERFECT for me and for us.
(There is one little part of the story that sealed the deal for me and brought tears to my eyes. It was the name of the father. (something I will not be sharing..) but that names means SOOO much to me. And was my reason for starting this journey. I KNEW it was perfect and meant to be.)

I’m pretty sure I may have set the world record for the fastest person ever to reply back “YES, I LOVE THEM!!!”

My case manager responded right back and let me know she had just sent them my profile.

uh oh.. my happy loving butterflies turned into an INCREDIBLY nauseous feeling. MY PROFILE!!!!

Crap, Crap, Crap!! I wrote that profile in OCTOBER (it was now May) What did I say? What did I joke about? Would they understand the humor and the jokes. I was suddenly TERRIFIED knowing they have the option to pass on me. This PERFECT family could pass on me.

I asked my case manager to send me a copy of my profile, I read it. Critiqued it and paced around A LOT!

I knew it would be 2 days before I heard anything more from them. So I tried to keep myself occupied. (hint: it didn’t work!!)

I checked the clock on my phone to see what time it was where they lived, wondering when they’d FINALLY get to their email. What if they weren’t manic email checkers like me????

Less than 24 hours later we got the email that they loved us too!!!!

Not only did they love us, but we’d be flying BACK out to LA to meet them in LESS THAN 2 WEEKS! Oh My Wow!!!

We were so ready (and hadn’t unpacked yet (BONUS!))

The day after Memorial Day we were off to meet the family that (we hoped) would change our lives forever…

To be continued… (SOON, I promise.. SORRY!!!)